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From left: Julia Latash and Lia
Lehrer (parodists/singers); and Michael Lehrer (announcer).
[Click the picture for a bigger image.] |
Cairo: Pesach/Passover Songs
Sung to melodies from the musical Chicago
at the Lehrer Family Seder, 2003/5763
The real lyrics can be found here:
http://www.lyricsondemand.com/
soundtracks/c/chicagolyrics/
Announcer: And now, ladies and gentleman, I
present to you Pharaoh, singing of a problem he has noticed in
Cairo.
All Those Jews
Special words by Lia Lehrer and Julia
Latash
(Sung to the tune of "All that Jazz")
Come on babe, why don’t we rid the town
Of all those Jews?
I’m gonna break their knees,
And make them all fall down—
All those Jews.
Start the day,
I’ll make them work a lot
Where the Nile’s cold, and the sun is hot
They’re gonna build a town, and all their sons will drown
And all those Jews.
Announcer: And now, ladies and gentlemen,
the keeper of the keys, the master of the slaves—slave master
Pharaoh!
When You’re Good to Pharaoh
Special words by Lia Lehrer and Julia
Latash
(Sung to the tune of "When You’re Good to Mama")
Ask any of the people in my land
They’ll tell you that I won’t lend them a hand
I like them all but all of them hate me
Because my system works, my system called, Hebrew slavery
Got a little motto, always sees me through
When you’re good to Pharaoh, Pharaoh’s good to you.
There’s a lot of favors I’m prepared to do
You do one for Pharaoh, he’ll do one for you
Announcer: And now, the Hebrew slaves of
Cairo, in their rendition of the Slave Plague Tango.
Slave Plague Tango
Special words by Lia Lehrer and Julia
Latash
(Sung to the tune of "Cell
Block Tango")
Blood, frogs, lice, beasts, pestilence,
boils, hail, locusts, darkness, death
He had it comin’, he had it comin’, he only
had himself to blame, if you’d have been there, if you’d have
seen it, I bet you you would have done the same.
So we had this slave master, Pharaoh. He
wasn’t a very nice guy. He was always hoppin’ around, telling us
what to do. Never gave us time to relax. So one day, we had G-d
teach Pharaoh a lesson. G-d sent Pharaoh frogs…into his bed.
He had it comin’, he had it comin’, he took
a flower in its prime, and then he used it, and he abused it,
they were 10 plagues, but not a crime.
Eight plagues later, and you’d think he’d
have gotten the hint. But Pharaoh still kept the light out of
our lives. He still treated us really badly, and made us do all
this work. So G-d decided to send him another warning.
Unfortunately for Pharaoh, this plague didn’t shed a whole lot
of light on the situation.
He had it comin’, he had it comin’, he only
had himself to blame, if you’d have been there, if you’d have
seen it, I bet you you would have done the same.
Blood, frogs, lice, beasts, pestilence,
boils, hail, locusts, darkness, death.
I bet you you would have done the same.
Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, your
fearless and dedicated leader, Moses
Moses
Special words by Lia Lehrer and Julia
Latash
(Sung to the tune of "Roxie")
The name on everybody’s lips
Is gonna be,
Moses
The leader leading all the trips
Is gonna
be, Moses
I’m gonna be a celebrity
That means somebody everyone knows
I’ll be the guy the people trust and love
They’ll even call me Mose
From just some Hebrew basket boy
I’m gonna be, Moses
But who says leadership’s not hard?
Who knew a guy who was in exile
Would lead his people from the Nile?
That’s Moses!
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